Fifth attempt

This morning I had my fifth IUI. It's strange, I'm not excited this time. Instead of thinking about a maybe baby, I am spending more time thinking about the next cycle. I think when I finally do get pregnant I'll just be shocked. I feel like I'm just stuck in a pattern of trying to get pregnant.

Clomid has decided not to be my friend this month. In fact, it's been downright nasty! My period cramps were worse and lasted longer.  I had bouts of nausea, one time so day I thought I was going to throw up in front of my classroom! Last night I was really dizzy and today my lower abdomen has been achy. That wasn't terribly helpful today with the IUI. Normally I cramp a little, but the achy-ness has made it more uncomfortable this afternoon. Added to that is the crazy emotional swings.  I get stressed - really stressed- easily.  I want to cry at the drop of a hat.  I'm so sick of it!

I spoke with Karen about it when she did my IUI and she said there are other meds we can try, possibly even injections. We'll go back in in two weeks and talk with Dr. Steinkampf about our options.  We are approved for 2-3 more IUIs, but our insurance will only cover 3 more IUIs. We have some major decisions coming up.

I have found a support group on Facebook this past week for women and their families who are trying to conceive through IUI.  It has been wonderful to find a community of 900+ women who are all on the same crazy roller coaster ride.  Now my Facebook feed is not just endless baby pics and pregnancy announcements from proud parents. In the mix, I now see posts from girls hopefully beginning new cycles, dealing with heartbreaking disappointment from failed cycles, and occasionally sharing a BFP to give the rest of us hope. I have never been alone in this process thanks to my God, my wonderful Donny, and my family. Now I have an entire army of fellow combatants in the infertility battle.

Thanks to all of you who have been keeping up with me through this mess.  Your calls, letters, facebook messages, emails, and words of encouragement have meant the world to me. Please keep the prayers coming! I am so thankful for each of you prayer warriors!